Introduction

Dear chicks,

Growing up sure isn’t easy.

As someone who has survived the process, I can definitely attest to this. It is an uphill battle that every teenager struggles with — when “change” is the one word often greeted with fear.

The bummer is, girls seem to have it tougher than boys during the teenage period. As if the process of self-discovery isn’t baffling — albeit exciting —enough, there’re developing hormones and a multitude of changes to your body thrown into the mix. Add to this craziness a mashup of contradictory opinions from your parents, peers, schools and the media, and the result is total chaos!

Who should you give your attention to? Which piece of advice should you take?

Looking back, I wish I had a magical compass that could guide me through those tumultuous yet thrilling years. And then I realised that I did. It wasn’t magic, but I was just too stubborn to recognise an awesome resource I had all along — my folks.

Now before you slam this book shut because you feel your parents are the last people you could relate to, hear me out. One of the best parts of being a teen is having those moments when you feel you have figured the world out. And it seems like others — quite often mum and dad — have no idea what you’re on about. But here’s a little secret that dawned on me: Those people who have the same genetic make-up as me, and genuinely have my best interests at heart, were perhaps the most experienced people I knew in my teens. And yet I didn’t let them in.

Let’s face it, quite often what our parents (and anyone old enough to have used a payphone, for that matter) tell us come across as, for lack of a better metaphor, verbal diarrhea. Our parents are un-cool, un-hip, un-fashionable...

just

so

Un!

But, chicks, you’ve just got to free your mind.

I didn’t write this book to add to the noise and chaos of your lives, nor was I bribed by your folks to brainwash you into being the world’s best daughter. I’m just an ordinary girl, like you, with a passion to help daughters get along better with their parents by sharing my experiences.

When I was growing up, I didn’t have the privilege of wiser counsel whom I could relate to. My support system was made up of my much older parents and relatives – I didn’t even have an older sister who could teach me how to apply mascara, much less knock some sense into me when I needed it most. So, I stubbornly chose to rough it out on my own, falling, semi-picking myself up and falling again.

But you don’t have to. Why struggle to get back on your feet when there’s someone waiting to help you up?

I hope this book will challenge you to take the first step in asking your parents for advice and insight on what I — a graduated teenager — have observed and learnt. The world can be judgmental, superficial and exploitative, and our parents can’t change the ways of the world — but they can certainly help us prepare for it.

Okay, I confess, parents don’t have the answers to life’s every question. But — as hard as it is to sometimes admit — they’re likely to know more than an average teen. It’s impossible to imagine, but your dad and mum were teenagers once too. And no, there aren’t vending machines that dispense solutions to the world’s woes. People need to live their lives and learn from their experiences, and the mistakes of others — which is a process your parents have gone through.

Now, don’t fret if mum isn’t the most approachable person you know, or hanging out with dad isn’t quite like a bonding session with your gal pals. Sometimes, we’re the ones who need a perspective reboot to change the way we interact with our parents. You get what you give. If you treat your parents like outsiders, that’s what they’ll be. Would you consider letting them in?

We all want to grow up to be someone successful and happy, but we need to make sure we choose the right tools to find success. That’s exactly why I’m writing this book. Now that I have a few more years under my belt, I have the perspective to say for certain that parents are the true stylists of our lives’ wardrobes — they can provide the essential clothes (and accessories) to package us for success.

I hope this book helps parents and daughters communicate more and do it better. As you flip through the pages, you’ll notice each chapter is themed around a piece of clothing, and the life tool it represents. Not all parents may be fashionistas, so sometimes girls feel like there isn’t much to bond over with their parents. But how about combining the powers of the parent, the chick and the wardrobe to help girls arrive at a style that puts them in their best light, and “clothe” girls for success? The right fit, whether in terms of clothes, or good advice from your parents, will bring out the best in you.

Every chapter in the book is your personal “how-to” guide for you and your folks to help package you as the success story that you one day will be! By the end of The Parent, the Chick and the Wardrobe, you’ll end up with the ultimate ensemble to help you fulfil your purpose in life. Let’s start getting dressed!

Love,

Jacyln